Cloudy

Sometimes you need less light,
To see a little more clearly.
Sometimes more needs to be hidden from you,
To know what to do, exactly.

How is it some words never leave your brain,
And they always come in the exact same way?
Like a song stuck in your head forever,
It's a mantra you retreat to each day.

If all is cleansed, then it's a race to the finish,
To see what kind of life can be obtained,
By taking a stand less than categorical,
And perhaps the hardest to be maintained.

And it's alright,
At least it keeps up with some exercise,
And that is remembering we can't say it all,
Because you can't see all from the sun in the sky.

Making It

The things that have been happening,
Outside of the things that don't,
Overcome the obstacle of latency,
That most things just won't.

And that leaves what, when what is what one must ask,
And what one cannot get an answer to,
But is what drives one past living for the moment?
You don't want to do that, now do you?

Forget it all, all that is needed is action.
What is strived for but a reflex of thought,
That eliminates the need for options? Because,
Options are what are obstacles to what can be taught.

And it's alright,
You may stumble your way through it all in the end,
And life might let you end up on the other side.
Though I'd much rather think my way round the bend.

Road to Happiness

All that life requires,
Is a little faith in it.
Imagine all your dreams are only what will happen,
Once you let them go and then forget.

And, of course, some humanity's required,
Though, it seems that for many it don't.
I know it's corny, but if you think the heartless will be happy,
Even if they are successful, they won't.

Nature teaches us this when any phenomenon happens,
That is destructive to what we know as the way,
Things should be, but it's only how they've been lately.
Nature's only what it is on any day.

And it's alright,
I guess if it's in your Nature to be an ass,
You have as much chance at happiness as anyone,
And I'll probably never see the kind of riches you'll amass.

Dreams

Time has gone so slowly.
Is that a weird thing to say?
My thoughts have spanned so many possibilities,
All my freedom's in my brain.

And is that wrong to retreat into yourself?
I mean, if you still take care of those that you love,
Or appear to, sometimes you find a person,
Who really cannot feel that stuff.

My soul has floated through portals to another,
Place where I am lost but where all,
Is back to the place where all is possible.
Am I prepared to really make that fall?

And it's alright,
It's the drink that causes these inequities,
And though it's certainly fun while it lasts,
My guilt always brings me back to reality.

Birth

I have been inside the womb,
I'm sure you can relate to that.
The spirits in there are not hidden from you,
And potential is the only fact.

One thought germinates in the flesh of your soul,
And only you know what it is, you may not.
You may manipulate it or let it be changed.
But it's the only thing of worth that you've got.

And you can go back, and many do,
Some uncontrollably, some to search for truth.
Some to wash themselves of the fears of the world,
And to return to the innocence of youth.

And it's alright,
In there you'll never feel insecurity.
You're all there is except for those waiting for you,
To get on stage and give hope to all society.

Time Will Come

What do I really have to say?
I guess only time will tell,
As it will tell so many things.
I just hope that it all turns well.

So many lives end up not like one imagined,
And that can be both in good ways and in bad,
And though one does all one can to make it one way,
It always ends up being some way unimagined.

I've let out so many hints like forest aromas,
But the Nature in my moves lacked,
Or the latency in their effectiveness,
Make me feel I may as well never act.

And it's alright,
That is pretty harsh, I know,
And presumptuous as well for that matter,
And pretty cynical.

Virtue in Right

There are people who can talk outwardly,
As if the world belonged to them.
That kind of person is usually not me,
For I prefer to just sit and listen.

But they belong to a class that makes its fortune,
By just believing that it's theirs by divine right.
I wish I had that power within me,
And if I do, I wish it would come to light.

With that power I could do so much good,
Though I don't know if it necessitates,
Spirits of evil working within me.
For such presumption, perhaps there must too be hate.

And it's alright,
I might be able to still play the game,
With obliviousness on my side,
I might just win the world all the same.

Not Yet

I would not say,
That it's all downhill from here.
To say that I would need some outside knowledge,
And would need to keep Mephistopheles near.

I only wonder without ever knowing,
And that is the anchor that I use,
While some people seem to know and not wonder.
But do either of us really not lose?

Is this the end of it all?
There were dreams I had that do not fit,
In anyway that I can see with my mind,
But, then, my mind can not see all of it.

And it's alright,
A different opinion is to follow,
The moment something unexpected happens,
And it might seem for a moment I may know.

Overexposure

What is this feeling I have?
As if a cloud encapsulates my head.
If everyone in the world felt this way,
Everyone in the world would be dead.

The head is the thing that the body transports,
To wherever the body desires,
And tries to make sense of the things it does.
Sometimes to do that it needs be a liar.

And then only to itself, so what's the point,
Of having the head, but to coordinate the act?
I guess the conflict between all the shoulds and the aughts,
Give meaning where otherwise there's just fact.

And it's alright,
I'm not giving my head up anytime soon.
I just hope it has an idea where to go,
Or that those around me can guide me from doom.

Through the Brush

It is coming close now,
As long as the anticipation stays minimal.
An unawareness of the speed of time,
Really helps things be simultanial.

The room is full with paisley visions of duty,
And the clutter of vague notions of my goals,
And there you are among the ruins of the dreams,
That as a prerequisite life always doles.

Not until I am whole will this body rest,
And may this body never rest in peace,
Unless that conjures up the spirits that haunt,
A life even after that life is deceased.

And it's alright,
Ultimately whatever happens will be.
But if magic happens so much to fantastic people,
Then when will it happen to me?

The Cup

If I take this cup to my lips,
I don't know what might happen,
But if I live to talk about it,
I may have to do it again.

It means that I risk it all, even the ones,
Around me who depend on stability.
The chances are slim, but the possible rewards,
Make my risking them a real possibility.

And what of their looks when I have both,
Risked what we have and produced nothing new?
Will they trust in my love as the motivator,
Or in my entirely selfish attitude?

And I'm alright,
When you really get to know me.
I may be distant, but I am a good resource,
Kind of like a library.

Busy

Busy, so very busy,
Busy, but not too busy for you,
If you give me twenty minutes right now,
I'll figure out how to give you two.

I do love you, I love you, do you know how much?
Let me take some time to figure it out.
I think of you and many things come to mind,
Too many right now, I'm afraid you may doubt.

Forget it all, just let it out of your mind,
Because I think I'm thinking of something else,
Already, and I'm so loosely in touch with my feelings,
I'm afraid that I can't really trust myself.

And it's alright,
Someday it may be clear to all but me.
I'm doing things now to heal the world,
But it will hurt those I love ultimately.

Any Day Now

Could it be that I have found it?
The key to my deepest dreams.
Only time will tell, as with everything.
I must sit and wait, it seems.

It seems almost clear, but there's more work to be done,
As in, I must do some work, at least.
It's not much different than it's been in the past,
I just have to make sure this is not a tease.

It is within you, you just have to let go,
For a moment, of all the things that you are.
Just that glimpse will give you a thirst for the truth,
And a desire to reach for the stars.

But it's alright,
It's cool to just be satisfied with thirst.
There is doing, and then there's what's to be done,
And it's hard knowing which is right to do first.

One Year

It's a very special day,
Something called my anniversary,
It's been a good year with lots of good times,
And adversity.

I have two lives, but only stay on one side,
And admire the grass on the other.
Right now it's such a joy just admiring it,
That it has no other lure.

And I could never find the exact place I was in,
If I went over and tried to get back.
The first time you try something, something's never quite right.
Of course, life is always just like that.

And it's alright,
Life is very, very long.
You're never expected to do everything right,
Or to avoid everything that is wrong.

In Haste

Here we go again,
And I've hardly been awake.
Too many responsibilities slowly walking towards me.
I want to escape.

I want to look at it all from the outside like I used to,
Without anything really depending on me.
Will this serve to deepen or stunt my growth,
While others grow necessarily?

I need a cleansing in the world around me,
Or I need to find another one.
And wander for the ages that take a moment.
I need some good old time travelation.

And it's alright,
I haven't lost my mind entirely,
I still have enough to explain myself,
Even if I'm talking to nobody.

Stunted Growth

That little man inside me,
Was not created by me,
But I certainly stunted his growth,
Out of anxiety.

And is it too late to give him his freedom?
Is he too small to let run amok?
Of course, if I'd let him be nurtured from the start,
He'd be a giant and I'd be a stud.

It was fear that kept him hidden from me,
And that fear sprung from nothing else but how I,
Was brought up, and I don't want that for my kids.
But I don't want to tread waters that aren't mine.

I guess it's alright,
Nature/Nurture, who the hell am I to say?
I like myself, and myself includes stunted growth.
I might not have liked a full grown stud anyway.

Change

I missed another one.
What does that say about me,
When all one has is his word and a loose sense,
Of his own identity?

One lives life like a lake, and forever remains,
Where one can find her, though she is not the same,
And one day she may flow out of herself,
And undermine the purpose of a name.

And why not, love is forever but we are not,
But can experience death through change,
And reincarnate till the cows come home.
We just sacrifice any meaningful exchange.

And its alright,
Wandering can be good, though mostly it's bad.
First of all how can anyone find you?
And how can you ever hope to understand?

Stress

Stress almost overtook me,
Like spirits outside my body.
I did not fight it, but it would not leave.
I had to live around that monstrosity.

The combinations of the things in my life,
Converged in one area to thwart all else.
A waterfall of tears was coaxing my own,
And challenging my own sense of self.

My words were controlled, but my body was not,
And I think I poisoned all parts of it.
Thinking about it reveals etched memory,
Forever a memory of regret.

And it's alright,
This will all be behind me one day,
And from now on I'll follow my instincts,
And avoid an act that makes me feel this way.

Cheating

Is this true regret,
That fills my throat with lumps,
And makes my heart feel like it might just stop?
Now, will my day truly not come?

Or is it like the thought I had about thought,
And the thought that it creates what you think?
If all my life is to be taken up by this,
It better provide me what I want without working.

And what the world defines as what I have now,
I don't have to take as the way things are.
Even now these symptoms of being constrained,
Are not good for me so far.

And it's alright,
Lots of things happen everyday.
Some make things worse and some make things better.
As long as I'm satisfied by the end of day.

Gotta Go

I guess I really get it,
And that's what really hurts,
Because the language that exists over here,
Is really of no use to anyone that matters.

Unless you're thinking self-destructively,
And want to lose yourself, I'm you're man.
Your love is so great for the one that you love,
You want to create a revolution.

Sometimes I need to go so quickly I can't,
Quite tell you what it is I came here to.
So good-bye, because if I get caught now,
I'll never be able to really return.

And it's alright,
The nervousness may never leave me,
And maybe that is part of the attraction,
To the way I live obscuriously.

Good bye Laptop

I can live without you,
Now that you are dead.
You were indispensable while alive,
But, I can live without you, as I said.

There's much inside you that I can still retrieve,
Though much of my life would be taken by that.
Maybe it's best to just let all of it go,
And rebuild my life, just like a cat.

Too much is made of the value of information,
Just like of the value of money.
If they were so fluid I could make them part of me,
It would be my person that had importancy.

And it's alright,
It's better to strip oneself of the world, no?
We all need reminding that life is much more,
Than the things we make to help make life go.