Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Teeming

Thank god that time passes quickly,
And before you know it, you are old.
If I had to live any longer,
I would surely fold.

The future promises to demand certain acts,
That, when counted, are already a lot,
But can't possibly be the entire sum.
I'm already beat after what I have fought.

But, then again, I would not want to have nothing,
So, this may be a beef with life itself.
Who the fuck asked for me to be born at all?
Wasn't there anybody else?

And it's alright,
I'm not really that mad,
After it's done, I'm always happy,
And I always think it wasn't that bad.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Perserverence

Could this be the one?
I don't want to beat a dead horse,
But sometimes your mind can tell you something,
That you consistently ignore.

You can't get blood from a stone unless you hit someone with it,
And I'm afraid that might be what I need to do.
Which will mean that I'll have to meet someone,
Which will be harder on me than you.

Or I could just leave it all, I'm getting nothing,
For the effort that I have been putting in.
I know what you're thinking, but it's not what you think,
I'm just slowly losing locomotion.

And it's alright,
What is it all for anyway?
Five minutes of glory and a life of ball-busting.
I could get that from my family.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Message

This is definitely the end,
There is nothing left to say,
Unlike for some people who could talk forever,
I'm at a loss for words today.

And why not? Isn't a person defined,
By the things that he does and doesn't do?
And aren't those actions based on inclinations,
That can be described, too?

And why repeat? I've nothing to prove,
And no reason to want to bore you to death.
Of course, there's the notion that some people must speak,
One time for each and everyone on this earth.

Oh, it's alright,
I haven't even really figured out, yet,
What it is I want to be saying at all,
And have yet to convince every person I've met.

Sunday, January 28, 2007

The Binge

This is not the time,
To be thinking of the little things,
Like how much you disgraced yourself,
After having a few drinks.

When you did things that you would never do,
But for the restraints of sobriety,
Not to say that you'd never thought of it,
But never as a member of society.

And the effects rage on, for now it's the morning,
Continue to relieve the inner police,
With commendations for sufficient restraint,
From completely undermining relief.

And it's alright,
Nothing really happens,
That one has to worry about, all's forgiven.
So, go out an do it again.

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Perfection

You are not what people think,
Nor what you think you are, yourself,
Actually, if you think you are definable,
You're just an inanimate toy on a shelf.

Think of any moment in your life,
And tell me one thing,
In retrospect, did you do exactly what you'dve liked?
'Cause, if you say 'yes', then you are lying.

Even your grandest moment of accolades,
When you are raised up high on shoulders,
You're up there because you overcame adversity,
Not because it's something that 'you' deserved.

And it's alright,
That is just the nature of the beast.
True perfection is impossible in life.
But, you've got it to strive for, at least.

Friday, January 26, 2007

Hope

Is it really as simple,
As believing it will all work out,
And seeing that it all works out,
Because, so far it's all worked out?

And just because everyday the sun has risen,
Should we believe that it will rise again?
Well, in that case, as in the one previous,
It doesn't help to believe it ain't.

So, go on living in the dreamworld that helps you,
Continue to live as if the past is a law,
And whenever something good comes your way,
Assume the gods dropped it for you, that's all.

And it's alright,
If nothing drops for you anytime soon,
It's not about what you have, but what one day you could,
That helps you get out of bed before noon.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

It Will Get Done

Time to reorganize,
Take a step back and see where I've been,
Look with the look of a thousand eyes,
And help erase this anxiety.

Anything can be done,
Anything can be done,
Especially with a thousand eyes,
Anything can be done.

Each moment holds the key to an eternity,
With a thousand eyes,
And with a world created in each one,
Everything will get done in time.

And it's alright,
Remember everything will get done,
You have the look of a thousand eyes,
And in the end, the day will be won.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

The Superman

Have I hit rock bottom?
It's kind of hard to tell.
My body's aching and it is all dark down here,
But the notion's not a hard sell.

What is the protocol when everyone around you,
Feels that life's offering a loss?
If it's not a feeling of revolution,
Then dignity and happiness are the cost.

But there is someone who can rise above that,
With superhuman strength to see,
That no matter the technology that he doesn't have,
He has the right to be.

Then it's alright,
Because the only enemy he could have is himself,
And they are the bestest friends in the whole world,
Even if sometimes they get depressed.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Pressure

Was that really a moment?
Even if it was, it doesn't matter,
Because the best bet on keeping the magic,
Is to allow it no future.

Except in the mind, where one can always escape.
One can even defy the elements,
If she needs to escape the harshness of this world.
The mind is heaven-sent.

I can't go on, the heaviness of everything,
Denies the possibility of freedom,
Like in a U-Boat at the bottom of the sea,
With no fuel left in its engine.

And it's alright,
Everybody floats back up eventually.
The questions is, will you be crushed by the pressure,
And never reach the person you wished to be?

Monday, January 22, 2007

Value

Why is it possible,
To work most of your life,
As a part of the structure of society,
And still live under the poverty line?

Is it illusion and the work isn't done,
And if you really want to you can survive?
I'm sure it is to a certain degree,
But you're still surviving under the poverty line.

And then the value of work is arbitrary,
Or at least not tied to its importance to us,
Just like the value of money's not tied to gold,
Not like that, in itself, is really genious.

Alright,
So humans assign value arbitrarily,
Which is one of the things that makes us unique,
Both as individuals and as societies.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Forever

Can I say I love you?
I could say it everyday of my life.
The more I do it, the less important it is.
Though, it's something I don't really advise.

Your smiles come so fast for absolutely nothing,
I hope that they never leave your face,
And get buried deep inside, to never come out,
Because you ultimately forget this place.

And your play, if it could only last forever,
My job will be done for you.
Not that that has gotten me very far.
Of course, I have yet to do all that I will do.

And it's alright,
If I have to support you until I die,
At least you'll have the memory to go to,
When you're wondering about the point of life.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

The End

I'm not saying that you,
Aren't what I've always wanted,
But sometimes when you get what you're asking for,
You wish you'd waited a jaunt.

I've nothing left to say, and no way to say it,
And no more combinations thereof,
So this will be my last attempt at,
Communication.

You need to show me more, and this is the answer,
To the puzzle that has left both our lives,
As barren as if we moved to the desert,
And clearcut everything besides.

And it's alright,
I won't be gone forever,
Just until I think of something to say,
That is not a repeat of whatever.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Development

So much is dependent,
On the moments of your youth.
Yet, you don't know who to seek out for guidance,
Or from whom to stay aloof.

There are so many sentences I should have been given,
At key points in my development.
They could have made all the difference in the world,
But, of course, I didn't.

Like, "last one up always gets the girl,"
Or, "it's not that hard to have fun and still do your work,"
"Good grades actually mean something for your future,"
"You're still young, so go and do something berserk."

And it's alright,
It's not like my life is filled with regrets,
At least, I've ended up someplace pretty cool,
Even if my youth could have had much more depth.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Death

I'm so very tired,
I don't think my body could ever catch up,
To what it needs to feel normal again,
While still continuing, as such.

Have you ever had a dream where you are driving,
Up a hill that is obviously too steep?
You get turned around and hopefully don't crash.
But, you should have known better, even in your sleep.

Well, I'm going to die now, so this may be the end,
Though words may still come from my unearthly voice,
Into this world and do more than they have,
For what's more moving than an undefined noise?

And it's alright,
Death can mean so many things.
It may only mean the death of all my dreams,
Which would be much less disturbing.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Sore Throat

This is not the time,
To pause for reflection.
The duties I've been given by virtue of this life,
Are waiting in anticipation.

Despite what might be happening in my real life,
The world demands my time outside of it,
To avoid changing circumstances in the former,
And leaving me not able to pay for it.

So where's the option outside of pure freedom,
Whether in the rich sense or in the sense of another,
Kind of structure where still not everyone's free,
Because someone needs to use the shovel?

And it's alright,
We're all distracted enough, anyway,
Not to notice the time demanded of us,
Nor, really, even to have the voice to say.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Overwhelming

Now that the dust has settled,
On everything that I own,
I imagine that they will be easier to deal with,
With atrophy in my bones.

Like a baby learning to crawl,
Falling off the bed and breaking his leg,
All the hard work has come to nothing at all,
And has become a heartbreaking tragedy.

But if it does, then all is for nothing,
For effort is the only thing I have.
So starting now, no matter what the circumstances,
I will do what I can.

And it's alright,
This has all happened in the past,
And I will get through, and just maybe this time,
The success will, for a long time, last.

Monday, January 15, 2007

Eternity

Well, it starts again, now,
Like it never has before,
Though, it is the same old thing over again,
My age is at least a little more.

The best things happen when you aren't expecting them,
This is because expectation devalues things,
And makes them terrible when they don't happen,
Even if the chances of it were near nothing.

Just hold on to love because it exists out of time,
And you never want anything to change.
The world could implode, and in the final moments,
That love will manufacture an eternity.

And it's alright,
Those moments could be an eternity of pain, I guess.
And who's to devalue such an emotion,
When its duration will have been no less?

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Distraction

Here is the greatest test,
But, of course, that's a big line.
Who's to say what's the hardest thing,
Until they can say, "it's mine"?

There is so much going on,
Without wanting anyone to see,
And no silence to let thoughts be alone,
To say, "that's exclusively me."

But, that may be the most truthful,
To what reality is.
One can't filter all that comes in,
To say that all that's left is his.

And it's alright,
As long as he gets to the end,
To put it away for later,
And to say, "I can start again."

Saturday, January 13, 2007

The Secret

It was getting hairy,
But it call came out in the wash,
While someone thinking that she knew the secret,
And my sanity getting lost.

What's so bad about being up a creek without a paddle,
If the current takes you where you want?
The water's only usually a couple feet deep,
You can always get out and walk.

So is it really all just about believing,
That it will work out, and suddenly it does?
I guess if by work out you mean whatever,
And by believing, you really don't care what's up.

And it's alright,
Lots of people have lived their life that way,
And I'm sure some of them ended up dying happy,
By some freakish impossibility.

Friday, January 12, 2007

Privacy

The images through my mind,
So strong, and yet sadly, unreal,
Haunt me at the times when they are most improbable,
Because she is so near.

That is too much, now they should wander again,
But isn't that just denying free thought?
If I thought anyone was privy to these,
I'd be far more tortured than not.

For what is thought, but the spigot for desire,
When desire must be safely unleashed?
Let my thought be subject to regulation,
And my thought would soon be deceased.

And it's alright,
There will always be thought without action.
Of course, there will also be action without thought,
Sprung from thought's natural reactions.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Wintry Night Walk

As I walked to the place,
That was left for me to retrieve,
The food that we would eat on that very night,
Something occurred to me.

With the cold just making it past my layers,
And the anger seeping out the other way,
And my eyes sifting through the carapaces of the women,
Not noticing me that day.

What is life, but just the determination,
To not let life ruin what you could feel,
If you could feel without the intrusion of the things,
That happens in life to make it feel real?

And it's alright,
I took the food home and it wasn't that great,
But by the end the anger had found it's place,
Among the many gifts I've received from fate.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Lucid Dreams

I have no more time now,
It's all been taken from me,
Just like the freedom to go where I please,
My bed and surrounding area's all that I see.

Except for excursions among other people,
But, those never seem to offer up much.
My abilities to share have never been strong,
And others' ability to care, just sucks.

At least there's loved ones close by from whom I get strength,
And to whom I can go to for pause,
From this life that's been ordained for everyone,
And ultimately ends in a net of loss.

And it's alright,
Disappointment for other people,
Seems to be what I've been best at lately,
And I see no cause to be more helpful.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Improve

The faith that nothing's happening,
That is not what should be,
Is perhaps the one most important thing,
To making people believe,

That nothing's accidental, but is anything?
The poorest laid plans sometimes work despite of them.
And when they don't, well, what can I say?
Somebody else had a different plan.

Ultimately, though, we all get what we want,
Whether we admit it or not.
We all whisper to the wind our greatest desires,
Though, what they are, most of us have forgot.

And it's alright,
Lose yourself and you'll sober up.
Whether by choice or the effects of time,
Reality's there whether you like it or not.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Time

Is there enough time to,
Do all you want to do?
Knowing's half the battle,
So, if you don't know, then you should soon.

Five minutes to get it done,
And a lifetime until it's perfect,
And if there's chaos, just sit back and relax,
That's the only way you will figure out it.

Or just surrender, for you already know,
What the ultimate end needs to be,
But if you don't know what direction it's in,
You'll have to trust to the wisdom of your body.

And it's alright,
Your body can mean so many things,
The point is there's so much you can never know,
But to which you can surrender your whole being.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

News of the Day

There's nothing much new happening,
There's a scandal in the church,
A war is happening in ten different countries,
And all our poor are getting hurt.

There is a lot of hubbub about the air,
And in there air there is a lot of talk,
About how something drastic has to happen.
Isn't it a great time for the government to step up?

The government that has the people at heart,
Like in the Ukraine or in Sri Lanka.
Did I just make a political statement?
Because I sure didn't mean ta.

And it's alright,
We keep asking ourselves if things have really changed.
Technology sure promises to make things easier,
If it doesn't first help to destroy everything.

Saturday, January 06, 2007

The Break

Here we go now, ready,
The road is paved and the engine's on,
The driving won't be easy, but if you concentrate,
It's hard not to get to your destination.

The wind's behind us, people on the side are cheering,
Nobody's going to stand in your way,
Except those who love you, who don't want you to go,
But you will be back one day.

With more than you have and more than you would,
If you just stayed here, getting what you could.
And if you ever think staying here was a better idea,
Then you probably should.

And it's alright,
Whatever you do in the end,
No one ultimately cares if it's you,
They just need anybody to send.

Friday, January 05, 2007

Maturation

Well, I think it's happened,
And there is no turning back,
Unless you want to return to your old life,
But I don't think you want that.

From now on it's hard work and you can't avoid it,
Until it becomes second nature,
And you are simply going through the motions,
Then it's time, again, to get more mature.

And this is what it means to become more human,
It's the one thing that's not sad but true.
Even if you're a fat cat, you can't be said to be living,
Unless there's something living inside of you.

And it's alright,
Sometimes you'll still be all dead inside,
That's just like a night in the folds of a dream,
Or the moments in the neap of a tide.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Longevity

The true colours are coming,
Out of the exacting honesty of life,
Unless fate can be changed and concentration can,
Readjust the lack of concentration with which I'm rife.

Hardwires can be reorganized, I think,
But does that require the knowledge of how,
It is that they ever got to where they were in the first place,
And if they changed to be what they are now?

Some people seem to have it all together.
And success and happiness exceeds money.
That was a statement in itself. I'm aware.
Is this a turning point for where I might be?

And it's alright,
You can't move until you're happy where you are,
Until then, you're just caught in the quagmire of self-pity,
And that state doesn't allow you to go far.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

It's About Time

Rummaging through the stuff,
Of a lacklustre past,
One finds so many potential moments,
And almost valuable artifacts.

And put together in just the right set,
The trash quickly turns into a treasure.
The worthlessness you now recognize in my rearing,
Gets a new light as I amass my future.

Forget the dinner, there so much more that I,
Can give you, once it all makes sense to others,
And people line up just to understand where they,
Fit amongst the shit piled up from years of torture.

And it's alright,
If this is not the gem of the pile,
The best things are not made up of the best things,
And everything good's worth waiting for a while.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Withstanding

The communication I expect,
To flow from my brain right through my heart,
Is all that's left to shape the things as they are,
Because all else aren't.

And though the way out doesn't seem obvious,
Things will work out, as they always have,
And not even my belief that belief undermines events,
Will undermine my ultimate repeating of the past.

Defeat's not an option, even if I lose,
My stance must ensure that immediately,
Another road of unbelievable riches,
Is opened up to me.

And it's alright,
If I am bruised, but not if I don't win,
That might have been acceptable in the past,
But now I must think of my future generations.

Monday, January 01, 2007

Happy New Year

Well, it is the new year,
And I entered it a failure,
In one thing, but that one thing became so big,
It obfuscated all my other allure.

Though, maybe this is just what the doctor ordered,
For all my other new years came with a bang,
And though the year that followed never quite sucked,
The most amazing thing in the world never came.

Oh wait, I was married and had a baby boy,
Got a job with lots of responsibility.
Of course those are all in the realm of the expected.
What about being propped above the rest of humanity?

And it's alright,
If your time never quite comes.
Part of life is that anticipation,
That is destroyed upon that elevation.