Self-Awareness

You’ve checked in with yourself,
A thousand times before,
It has taken you a long time this time,
You couldn’t think what for,

But then you’re reminded of who you are,
Next to what you’ve become,
You realize no matter how hard you tried,
Your essence informed ev’ry decision,

For despite what many may have told you,
The goal’s not to improve,
As if you can change who you really are,
Without losing you, too,

Who’re you to know,
What you should rather be?
Know thyself then let thyself carry on.
There is no better judge of thyself than thee.

Street Watching

Did you know you could die,
That you may have by now,
That one day you will certainly be dead,
The only question's how,

That everyone that you will ever meet,
Will be dead one day, too,
That most of the people that will e'er be,
Will not be known by or even of you,

That everyday is like a bonus day,
To do with as you please,
Working hard for generations coming,
Or ambling by with ease?

No matter what,
There is one thing you get,
Moments of awareness that you're unique,
As are the lives of those you haven't met.

Understanding

It gets no easier,
This life's repetition,
You arch forward just a little wiser,
Then loop right back again,

Yes, each cycle means you have made progress,
But, pray, tow'rds what, my friend?
Is there time in this short life to finish,
Even should you reach one hundred and ten?

Or does each generation carry on,
From where we have left off,
Destined to loop right back again, itself,
Making the same errs oft?

Tow'rds what, my friend?
Will we make it that far?
So many questions, asked so many times,
Just standing on one of the cycle's arch.

Looking Back

Let us begin over,
Each day is a new start,
Imagine you could do what you wanted,
Math, science, dance or art,

Replay anything in your history,
With knowledge you have now,
Though chances are you wouldn’t do diff’rent,
First impressions are made with a kapow,

It may alter some with experience,
You should hope that it does,
There’s always a chance in this fucked up world,
For obliviousness,

Or too much truth,
Moderation for all,
To provide the right flexibility,
So that the chips, where they may, can still fall.

Return

Oops, I did it again,
Hope it happens again,
Lest there is such a thing as jinxing it,
I will keep it hidden,

For there are things that die from being known,
Like one’s humility,
Certain molecules we have not found, yet,
The cosmic force that first brought you to me,

So, as I do cruise along life’s highway,
The wind against my face,
I’ll count my blessings with a chosen few,
With my best poker face,

But I’m ready,
Like I was twenty-two,
A time traveller to where there’s no time,
To ask why the universe blesses you.

It’s Yours

Remember that person,
That you were way back when,
You thought the world could offer anything,
Not in your possession?

You’d just put it out to the universe,
Then pow! And there it was,
No scepticism that there is no force,
That would take care of you simply because,

Because we are part of reality,
Like doubt is part of us,
When things don’t make sense when we look for it,
In arrogant disgust.

But that’s just us,
Once we learn to forget,
That life’s here for us and we’re here for life,
Nothing is not already ours to get.

Tomorrow

I am feeling swell, now,
Who knows ‘bout tomorrow,
Reality is unpredictable,
No one can really know,

Even yesterday can change day to day,
For some, it never has,
I mark mine by the ones that I’ve known you,
Every other day is just the past,

The ones to come won’t make me promises,
Nor will I give them one,
To tell the truth, promises make no sense,
With this situation.

Think about it,
What has been guaranteed,
Other than death, taxes, my love for you,
And, of course, the future’s uncertainty

You're Where You Are

Let us just start over,
Like nothing has happened,
The generations leading to our life,
Of which we're not the end,

Carrying with us epigenetic,
Past life influences,
Born in us despite how much we fight it,
Or the result of experiences,

Not to mention you should never alter,
A decision once made,
As if to reflap a butterfly's wing,
After its eggs are laid,

Or retrace love,
As if there's a tale there,
Or take microscopic pics of gladness,
To rearrange the molecules of air.

You’re Not Alone

Lonely as you may feel,
Surrounded by your friends,
Air so heavy it’s suffocating you,
Yet, you’re glad for the end,

There’s nothing like self-alienation,
It trumps the social net,
Either way your mind’s your worst enemy,
Worse when no one can talk you from the edge,

For in that bubble all logic is sound,
When you’re all that there is,
A legitimate possibility,
But also spurious,

For to exist,
Other folk there must be,
Else, who’ve you alienated yourself from,
Making yourself the grand authority?

What Will Come

Jump ahead fifteen years,
They’ll come, no matter what,
Whether you’ll be six feet under the ground,
Or living in a rut,

Sitting in a debtor’s jail night and day,
No money coming in,
On the streets, folks passing by with no word,
As you’re begging for a contribution,

Everyone you ever loved is gone,
Dead or they have left you,
Utterly alone with no good prospects,
No hope for something new,

What do you think?
I get it about right?
Sometimes it takes an extreme example,
To help you calibrate your own foresight.

When You're Alone

It's not hard to wonder,
What meaning there would be,
Without the things around you, you love most,
Like your fav'rite hobby,

The feeling of grass between your bare toes,
Somebody to talk to,
Music that describes your life to a tee,
Medication to help you fight the flu,

Love from a person whom you love back, too,
With a place to have it,
A way to express yourself to the world,
To make you feel legit,

All of these things,
Plus those I couldn't fit,
What are you without those things that make you?
Does the question make you apprec'ate it?

Good Bye For Now

I am feeling dizzy,
From what, I do not know,
Perhaps I'll fall and hit my head and die,
Because my blood's too low,

People will say it's such a tragic thing,
That I should die so young,
'fore my prime, after which it would be fine,
For, at least, my swan song would have been sung,

Little do they know that my coda's done,
Nor will it e'er exist,
I've lived a thousand lives inside my head,
Far too many to list,

I'm good to go,
How many can say that,
Without the accolades to prove they did,
Something worth making their coming death apt?

Loneliness

Loneliness is not real,
It is a state of mind,
Reflected on as if you were outside,
Observing from behind,

A diff'rent person other than yourself,
Thank god you are not they,
Lost in thought for how the world done them wrong,
There's not a goddamn thing that you could say,

Until they turn around and see you there,
They smile seductively,
The desp'rate act of a desperate child,
Who ne'er grew to be thee,

Now here you are,
Two people 'stead of one,
The proof that loneliness does not exist,
Only the outcome of self-reflection.

I Miss You

You might think you know me,
You might think you do not,
What I say of myself might contradict,
All that you have been taught,

You might not act'ally know who you are,
How would I even know?
You might have been told things about yourself,
That left you unable to let yourself go,

You might rely on others for self-worth,
I pray that's not what's true,
You might be happier if you knew you,
Like I'm sure that I do,

You'll never know,
Nobody every does,
Unless you have faith that you are someone,
You might never get to know who she was.

Running From The Moon

How can one existence,
Contain more than one life?
One moment excitement o'er a new day,
Achieving e'er new heights,

Then there is the despair we all have had,
There's no one who's immune,
You may as well try living in a plane,
Attempting to try and outrun the moon,

No less tragic are the unthinking times,
When life's not felt at all,
Comfort masquerades itself as success,
'til you look back at 't'all,

To find nothing.
Let no moment pass by,
That you can't reflect on as momentous,
In those last few moments before you die.

How Long Does a Fruit Fly Live?

We all die so quickly,
Faster than a fruit fly,
Assuming they have no goals in their life,
Or experience time,

Understanding that they don't mate for life,
Or, at least, that they try,
That they have no connection to their kids,
Or that they've never asked the question why.

A fruit fly has never looked at its past,
Wondering where it's gone,
The hopes, the dreams, and assumptions it had,
Of gaining great fortunes.

Granting all that,
We exist a few days,
While fruit flies trudge through an eternity,
Not appreciating the games time plays.

Maybe, Still

You're not getting younger,
But those around you are,
The goals you've had are shared by many more,
Who have not gone so far,

Who have their fingers on a diff'rent pulse,
Reflecting the next wave,
While your blood runs thin in the new regime,
For which those who will have already gave,

It's not about what you see anymore,
If it had ever been,
You've not made it yet, so you never will,
For it's a diff'rent scene,

Unless it's not,
If you've been telling truths,
Sometimes it takes a new generation,
To appreciate unrecognized sooths.

Beware The Dog Killers

Life is not a puzzle,
Of secrets hid by god,
Or with codes left in songs, when played backwards,
Writ with a knowing nod,

There is no morality that solves all,
Or can erase your guilt,
There was no thought put to its foundation,
When the structures that define us were built,

The voices that guide us is not instinct,
Nor embedded since birth,
For, as of yet, no one has cracked our code,
The only thing of worth.

Let there be light,
Shining forth from our minds,
Reflecting only the colors we know,
Determining what each of us can find.

The Next Moment

Zelda approaches the stone,
Like Arthur of old tales,
The blade is cold in hands raised up aloft,
Success aft’ many fails,

Confidence after evenings of self-doubt,
That linger even now,
Past wins are stories of another’s loss,
Who were wrong and yet defeated somehow,

Like just one foothold on a ragged face,
There is still far to go,
Despite the odds overcome to that point,
Fearing the fall below,

It never ends,
Best you understand this,
Each victory’s another trial’s start,
Passion does not promise another kiss.

How To Be

You will never be me,
E'en if you wanted to,
Forgive me for being as blood to trees,
But you have to be you,

Do not try to learn from mistakes I've made,
They'll ne'er be yours to try,
Maybe, just maybe, you have a hint of me,
As discarded pits are to cherry pie,

Though there is something to pass on to you,
More feeling than advise,
Nothing in your life will be filled with life,
Assoc'ated with vice,

Except on thing,
That only you can know,
I must admit, I've had one of my own,
It is the only thing that makes me go.

Your Call

There's nothing I like more,
I don't know what it is,
It is nothing I could ever describe,
Except to say it's bliss,

I can have it whenever I want it,
It will never run out,
No one e'er begrudges me when it's mine,
For there is nothing prettier, no doubt,

It can be impossibly hard to find,
Yet so easy to keep,
If you don't know what I'm talking about,
You have not yet dug deep,

May you still, yet,
God, may everyone,
Feel like there is nothing wrong with themselves,
A world basking in pure realization.

Living On Your Deathbed

When you're on your deathbed,
Knowing no turning back,
Time not hinged by what's passed and what's to come,
To assess what you lack,

Materials now lacking all meaning,
Just what you know and don't,
The comfort that there's time to fix things gone,
The future one big, empty, gaping moat,

Some folks embrace this moment as unique,
Take my mom for instance,
After all, there's only three things to live,
Birth, life, expiration,

Some more than once,
It is all perspective,
Some people experience rebirth a lot,
For others, death's the only way to live.

Living The Truth

E'vry moment's precious,
No matter what you love,
The feeling of the wind upon your face,
The sun shining above,

The caress of a soft hand on your back,
Watching your home team win,
Finally succeeding at a great task,
Into which you put loads of exertion,

Witnessing the loss of an enemy,
E'er plotting their demise,
Valuing revenge more than self-respect,
Accusing all of lies,

What floats your boat,
Is a-okay with me,
There's more to know about the world you own,
Than I've time for if I'm also to be.

Waking You Up

I'm a simple person,
Don't have to think 'bout much,
Just resting my foot against your bare leg,
Tickles my heart a bunch,

Most movies we watch together, I'll cry,
It is the spectacle,
I've got so many irons in the fire,
I never know who to expect to call,

At the end of the day all I expect,
Is to come out ahead,
E'en if up until the hour of my death,
I may as well've been dead,

Ain't that the truth,
Even simple is hard,
That is, if you're actually living,
Putting some thought in how to play your cards.

When

It is just so easy,
To question who you are,
One moment everything comes up roses,
And nowhere is too far,

It seems the world is open up to you,
People want you to win,
Though you don't now, you will have success soon,
You deserve it after much exertion,

Then the next moment when nothing has changed,
You start to look around,
Nothing's been handed to you, as of yet,
No one's making a sound,

You ask yourself,
When will you get your due,
You cannot help repeating to yourself,
Somebody somewhere must owe it to you

Stay Safe

They make it sound easy,
This thing they call success,
Take what you've been given for being born,
And risk it for a guess,

In a way, this would always be the case,
'fyou want to change your life,
Look around at what it is that you have,
Then be prepared to trade it all for strife,

With the possibility of your dreams,
Finally coming true,
Which, in the end, are never what you hoped,
But what else can you do?

Nothing at all?
Yes, that is an option,
Assume that the reward's not worth the risk,
Stay comfortable in the skin you're in.

Which Is It?

If I push you forward,
Do you fall on your face,
Or do you succeed where you might have failed,
Had you stayed in your place?

Now, what if instead I'm pulling you back,
By the scruff of your neck?
Is it because I'm jealous of your luck,
Or saving you from a terrible wreck?

Each case can be interpreted both ways,
Just like in scheduling,
Push a meeting back or pull it forward,
What does it really mean?

Just make a choice,
Stick to it to the end,
People may misunderstand you a while,
But consistency will be recompensed.

Reaching

Savor ev'ry moment,
Of this uncertainty,
That waning self-confidence that you have,
In your ability,

Look around at the world you inhabit,
Its lack of vividness,
Assembled by your underactive brain,
Deceived into remaining languorous,

Not by satisfaction, but by your fear,
Of failing to achieve,
Isn't it best to keep your dreams out there,
Than try and not succeed?

Some do say that,
Then live until they die,
That drab half of a world's there if you want,
If for the best one you'd rather not try.

Steady The Boat

Everything is close,
Waiting to be dealt with,
Some things you put off because it's not time,
As if it ever is,

But why not put off until you are dead,
What you could do today?
So much has happened that will never change,
It's not your place to propose other ways,

Just keep things the way they have always been,
I've already said that,
If you try to change the way things e'er've been,
You will not enjoy that,

So don't e'en try,
Aren't things great as is?
Let's discuss this again another day,
Meanwhile, just ignore time as it passes.

One Life

There are complications,
With which life is imbued,
What you known, have learned, know you've learned is right,
The angle those are viewed,

How others can influence what you do,
For reasons of their own,
Trying to keep near what's loved, far what's not,
Hoping to god you are not left alone,

Praying that instead that you're raised to great heights,
One above ev'ryone,
For whatever it is you feel you do,
That's your contribution,

If you have one,
It's hard to figure out,
Then if you do, I hope you are allowed,
For many reasons, that may be in doubt.

Grounded

I just realized something,
Amidst all of my thoughts,
While looking through my dad's ephemera,
With eyes that have seen lots,

Held by hands that have been used for many tasks,
Mostly with the same things,
With aims remaining in the narrow scope,
Of a world mostly premade for me,

Preoccupied by fleeting happenstance,
Nothing lasts very long,
Least of all the life any of us have,
Regardless of how strong,

We all forget,
Lost among diversions,
I'll never let go my father's affairs,
Despite all that hence will therefor be gone.

Take The Time

You are not your father,
Your mother, you are not,
You’re not the expectations laid on you,
That should not be your lot,

You’re not the words that you spoke yesterday,
Conjure them if you are,
You’re not your reactions to tragedy,
Or your own children or even your car,

You’re not the guilt for any of these things,
Or product of the past,
Nor an expression of what’s yet to come,
The future doesn’t last,

You’re who you are,
Who’s reading this right now,
It’s not a question of learning that truth,
It’s a matter of figuring out how.

Our Fate

When will it get started,
This thing that we call life,
Preparing from the time that we are born,
For misfortune and strife,

By people who haven’t figured it out,
Not those who did raise them?
Some say the fate of humans is sorrow,
Forever seeking out success and friends,

Never satisfied with what we do get,
E’er comparing to Jones,
Judging self-worth by what others attain,
Ignoring the forlorn,

For they’re failures,
Too lazy to succeed,
Until we find ourselves in the same boat,
Then we find others to judge in more need.

Getting What You Want

You cannot move forward,
If you’re stuck in the past,
If you see no reason to change your ways,
Or if you are an ass,

If you’re so happy you’ve nowhere to go,
That wouldn’t bring you down,
Until perhaps the narcotics wear off,
Or the factory closes in your town,

If you have no faith in evolution,
That things can change at all,
Ev’ryone stuck with their own lot in life,
Whether they rise or fall.

But if you do,
Have hopes beyond the now,
That reality is waiting for you,
When you stop asking yourself if, but how.

Close Your Eyes

We can all close our eyes,
No matter where we are,
Fill ourselves with the silence of our minds,
Amidst the trains and cars,

The constant droning of our daily fears,
Served fresh on the news feeds,
Look left or right, the outcome is the same,
The grass on the other side e’er needs seeds,

The agendas of ev’ryone you meet,
Paranoia’s legit,
If you don’t know who you are in this world,
You’ll be a piece of shit,

No, keep them closed,
We are not quite done, yet,
Don’t stop until you’re completely alone,
You want to re-enter the world, I bet.

Good Fortune

It’s the Chinese New Year,
Don’t know much about it,
I had some dumplings which should bring money,
I’m sure that is legit,

The year of the pig is ‘bout fortune, too,
I’m doing all I can,
In the spring I’ll be chasing each rainbow,
I wish for bird shit to drop where I stand,

Nothing is off the table from now on,
I have nothing to lose,
Like mom said doing nothing’s not a choice,
I have no time to choose,

So bring it on,
Before I’m on the streets,
If riches aren’t in my horoscope,
I’m off to start collecting rabbit feet.

No Matter What

No matter what happens,
Compared to what you want,
Disappointment, dreams come true, accolades,
Or a hist’ry that haunts,

 Or what’s more likely, the whole trifecta,
With prob’lly more thrown in,
Life is long, no matter how it might feel,
Or even if it’s short in duration,

 What will always be under your control,
Is how you look at it,
Though depending on how you were brought up,
You may think me a git.

Maybe I am,
Rather, I am for you,
Plus anyone else who has been in pain,
Minus my mom, who was dying and knew.

Rebel

If you want to be pinged,
You can't hide in a hole,
Asking yourself why you are so alone,
Despite your pretty soul,

You're one of many who wants to connect,
But want to wait for it,
A billion catchers waiting at home plate,
With nary anyone ready to pitch,

Put yourself out there, to use a cliché,
Or simply speak the truth,
That you should have no fear of who you are,
Is known early in youth.

You're born with it,
So why do we forget?
A custom of punishing honesty,
When it's different from what your parents said.

Who You Are

It's not about effort,
Though you need that for sure,
Connections help, but those you'll never get,
Without intentions pure,

A leg up's something you should not sneeze at,
You can't make it without,
This world exists and you must live in it,
Which means acceptance is a must, no doubt,

Still, all these things mean nothing in the end,
With nothing to bind to,
A thing that knows exactly what it is,
Is rarer than the truth,

So, is that you?
Do you know what I mean?
Defining what you see by who you are,
Not self-defined according to what's seen.

When You Are Old

When you get much older,
Let us pray that you do,
The types of goals reserved for younger ones,
Far out of your purview,

The concrete of your youth set long ago,
In fact, begins to crack,
Views you’re embarrassed to bring back to mind,
Experiences you wish to get back,

How will you feel about this museum,
Will it be just for you?
Cluttered, petty, irrelevant to most,
Perspectives barely true,

Or will you bask,
In its grand uniqueness,
The embrace of a quest thrust upon you,
Shining your truth despite life’s pettiness.

Improvisation for Peace

Let's improvise our life,
No suggestions are wrong,
That don't deny anyone's existence,
That has gone on too long,

For to be tall or short, skinny or fat,
Or any other thing,
Is a product of the combination,
Of one's environment and of one's genes,

Neither of which are in anyone's scope,
To change circumstance,
You may as well fault the rose for blooming,
Or the drag queens who dance,

Maybe it's greed,
That promotes our conflict,
But to improvise is to be selfless,
So that one's own fate can never be picked.

The Truth Inside

I forgot you were there,
Looking down upon me,
Symbolizing my most devilish parts,
Though, subliminally,

Like everything you don’t want to face,
Just shred it and forget,
Then, when it regenerates and returns,
Push it back down and then never fret it,

For what are we if not made to deny,
What is in all of us?
We propose ideal worlds for which to strive,
That are not serious,

We all know it,
They are repression tools,
Both, to forget the devil inside us,
And to control us as ignorant fools.

Embrace Yourself

Find what most distracts you,
With joyousness and bliss,
Fill your time with that as much as you can,
And I promise you this,

Serendipity with then follow you,
But that’s just a symptom,
Of your embracing of the skin you’re in,
Born of pure chance, not any intention,

Time will fly and stop simultanyusly,
All space will by your world,
Your words will be pure, your actions graceful,
Your greatness will unfurl,

We all have it,
That jewel inside us,
The error that hides it behind closed eyes,
Is the belief that life’s mysterious.

The Precarious Journey

It's easy to get down,
Both micro and macro,
Life can be so hard just as it is,
With naught to bring you low,

Add the things you have no control over,
Your upbringing forsooth,
Economic woes, emotional pains,
All before you lose your last baby tooth,

Then simple accidents can change your life,
Before revolution,
Ocean levels rising midst hurricanes,
Who do we e'en function?

It's mostly luck,
But love's a must also,
The kind that proves that other hearts exist,
Even in those people you may not know.

The New You

You can have a death wish,
Or you can wish for life,
Neither existence is less than th'other,
For suffering or strife,

Both can be struck with a fatality,
Or selflessness extreme,
As far as consciousness goes, let 'er rip,
You are as unique as what's ever been,

You have flavor that's never been tasted,
Do not water it down,
Purify it by shedding what is false,
You may be shocked what's found,

Something not new,
But buried way deep down,
Masking your real scent unnaturally,
So that the true you may never be found.

The Grind

You work hard all your life,
No matter who you are,
For money, love, self-gratification,
Making yourself a star,

Getting revenge on those who have wronged you,
A disgusting calling,
Born of an unfortunate upbringing,
The selfishness required appalling,

P’haps you’re helping those with less in their life,
Feeling like Sisyphus,
Or chasing one dream after another,
Never victorious,

No matter what,
It is you choose to do,
Ever try to project to your deathbed,
To be certain it is okay with you.

Figure It Out

This is an intense time,
No pretending it’s not,
Best open flood gates bursting at the seams,
Than leave an unsaid thought,

To unleash emotions, why chain them down,
When they’re only tamed free?
To spare the feelings of those around you,
From what’s really your true identity?

Or is it? You know you can never know.
Some try and live that way,
Proportionally they’re no happier,
Than living for the day.

So who’s to know?
You, you clueless human,
Maybe you’d have figured it out by now,
If you went out every once and again.

Be Heard

The engine is revving,
You have to go somewhere,
Foot to the floor until you’re far away,
The speed is beyond dare,

You fill the space around you with your screams,
Like anyone would heed,
It’s so futile trying to make your mark,
You want to pull a Thelma and Louise,

Not that that would make any difference,
Who e’en remembers them?
The best you can do to define yourself,
Is laughing in the end.

Make sure they hear!
Don’t be on the lone road,
Make donuts in the parking lot all day,
Keeping the trunk popped so they see your load.

What You Are

Wake up in the morning,
Survey all that you have,
Which is nothing except what you perceive,
And then not even that,

Some people mistake possessions as theirs,
And things as possessions,
Confusing what they own as who they are,
Things, pets, kids, dreams, ideas, emotions,

But you are less than all these perceptions,
You’re imperceptible,
Yet, larger than any life you could think,
Impossible to fill.

Impossible.
Sit on that for a while,
Now put on your clothes and face a new day,
Trying to absorb this truth all the while.

What

The what is the answer,
What ev'rybody knows,
Forget finding out what you're meant to be,
For what it's worth, it blows,

What really matter's what's not talked about,
Until it's much too late,
When what you are is just waiting to die,
What what you've not done can be blamed on fate,

But what about what you are doing now?
There is too much at stake,
To ask what the what, what is a what to do,
To avoid the mistake,

What not to do,
What's the point of it all?
You're so preoccupied with hows and whys,
You mistook what it is, for what it's called.

The Question

Can you keep up with it?
The changing of the times,
The fickle perception of your colleagues,
They can turn on a dime,

World views and the opinions of your friends,
Like the weather they change,
All that much harder for you to detect,
As your own understandings rearrange,

While leaders change as fast as the weather,
The weather changes, too,
What is it in these endless rough waters
You have to hold onto?

Well, truthfully,
That's not the right question,
Do not ask how the world can support you,
But how you find your equilibrium.

This Life

Oh, what you can get done,
Rid of some obsessions,
Freed of internet TV binge-watching,
Hugged by the couch cushions,

Supplemented by a bottle of wine,
Interrupted by chips,
Between scrolling through the updates and posts,
Of those you miss and those you’d like to hit,

After a day of hard correspondence,
Even while your driving,
A new system that leaves no room for you,
Just social surviving,

But all’s not lost,
The power’s within you,
Each moment offers a choice to succumb,
Or improve something that you like to do.

32 Chews

I did put the whole thing,
In my mouth in one go,
Not sure if that is any different,
Than biting nice and slow,

There are those who say the stomach suffers,
When mastication’s weak,
So I thoughtfully chew ‘til all I feel’s,
A warm, oatmeally sludge within my cheeks.

So what is there now to argue against?
Perception of excess,
When by the end I have eaten no more,
Than those who give bad press?

Just let it be,
There’s much more to fret ‘bout,
Just make sure what you have to say’s louder,
And that you don’t say it with a full mouth.

Emergency Call

I will come sing, tonight,
Despite what's best for you,
You will fulfill my desire to be seen,
More than a working schmoo,

More than a single dad, first I've said that,
Why not embrace the truth?
Which is diff'rent than simply not lying,
A maxim we have wasted on our youth,

More than a white male, may I point that out?
My genes have done a lot,
My guilt by association's legit,
Your innocence is not,

But let me play,
'fore you call 9-1-1,
Sometimes saying things melodiously,
Takes the attention from the musician.

Final Bid?

Put me up for auction,
Maybe an early lot,
Too early, I will feel unimportant,
No matter if I’m bought,

Last, of course misrepresents my value,
Stifling potential bids,
The greatest worth a person possesses,
Is that which others believe must be hid,

Find an auctioneer who fathoms the game,
Is not about the work,
If I had to rely on what I am,
What would bidders exert?

No offence meant,
Worth, here, is relative,
For them is satisfaction of the win,
For me is the satisfaction I give.

The Beat You Can Do

As I lie here waiting,
For the day to begin,
Time carries on despite my hesitance,
F’its continuation,

With humanity’s higher processes,
Why must we obey time?
Instead freezing experience we like,
Skipping the psychologically unkind,

Then I’d spend the resy of my existence,
In this bed here with you,
In this silence that expresses all that,
I’ve ever wished to do.

Though’s not to be,
Memory’s all we’ve got,
To refuse to let go of golden years,
‘Til our bodies give way to death and rot.

Build It

First you make the pieces,
Though you must plan 'fore that,
Sketch out precisely what it is you want,
Your measurements exact,

Follow the drawings with care and focus,
You only have one chance,
You want to do it right, be serious,
Want to have fun, well, just get up and dance,

Assemble them and watch the vision grow,
No wrong can be done here,
Your loved ones will see that there were reasons,
For which they need not fear,

For your goodness,
You just had things to do,
A life not lived is no real life at all,
Now your structure will support all of you.

I Want An Instant Camera

I want a Polaroid,
Something of importance,
That creates things in the physical world,
With real consequences,

To train my brain from an alternate view,
Value in the front end,
So that pulling a trigger means something,
For there’s a cost to doing a second,

Then when I look at what I’ve created,
My second chance ain’t lost,
I take what I learn for the next moment,
The last one I just toss,

No do-overs,
Isn’t that what’s at stake?
When you can’t be sure you’ve got what you want,
That picture will be much harder to take.

Getting There

There are things you work for,
Once on the horizon,
Then you stand among your accomplishments,
But they're an illusion,

The goal was not the goal, but the journey,
Not many truths in life,
You either work for things curse your luck,
Whether you live in comfort or in strife,

You cannot blame either approach, really,
It is nobody's fault,
It could be nature, it could be nurture,
Or sexual assault,

It could be god,
The trick's to see who y'are,
Strip away ev'rything that's not, just once,
To ensure that you do not stray too far.

Move On

You’re a diff’rent person,
Every time you wake,
Leave hair and skin embedded in your bed,
Radyation in your wake,

Each moment imprints completely unique,
Images on your eyes,
Filed away, contributing to your view,
Guiding your reactions to the outside,

Creating new traumas on your body,
Some terrible, some nice,
Don’t try to recapture who you once were,
That would be your demise,

You can’t go back,
You must be who you are,
The things you’ve done are a part of you, now,
Without it all you won’t get very far.

Three More Sleeps

Part of being ready,
Past the hours of study,
Mapping out all the things you have to do,
Preliminarily,

Repeating all the things you're not good at,
Until you feel you are,
Then repeating again 'til it becomes,
What people sometimes call second nature,

So that you actu'lly change who you are,
For the better, you guess,
E'en beyond this dedication of yours,
To top preparedness,

There is your fear,
That you must overcome,
Threatening to erase all your hard work,
If you lose faith in your evolution.

The Drink

You must acquire the taste,
No one’s born liking it,
The attraction is really its effects,
On fatigued temperaments,

It’s like it doesn’t travel down your throat,
But envelops your mind,
Opens your eyes and ears to the morning,
So that you can get through the daily grind,

All all these variations really prove.
Is it’s got to be masked,
Like a superhero saving the world,
Nothing told, nothing asked,

I mean coffee!
I’ve almost finished mine,
It marks the beginning of ev’ryday,
Its absence leaves you feeling you have died.

Back Pain

The pain came on sudden,
The origin unknown,
Looking for it took me away from it,
But from it you're not torn,

The trauma it's pointing to still exists,
Nestled in your mind's back,
Keep focusing on what is causing it,
To the detriment of the healing track,

The more you ignore the worse it will get,
The less you, you will be,
Until you find you're not living at all,
Mired in your tragedy,

But who'm I to say?
Some people thrive on pain,
Reaching great financial and social heights,
Off the backs of those who can't do the same.

No Odds

What's the point in trying?
Have I said that before?
Some people say never settle for less,
But always expect more.

Is that just a way to keep us all meek?
More questions than answers,
That we'll never get 'til the day we die,
Then only if we've got what we asked for,

Otherwise you can't prove a negative,
Maybe you died too young,
Or you had chances you didn't perceive,
Leaving your soul unsung,

Or th'opposite,<
This life makes no promise,
Ev'ryone might be Curie in their way,
With ninety percent of them being missed./blockquote>

Time

Days gone 'fore you know it,
That then turn into weeks,
What seems like new news is now ten years old,
Soon your bed pan will reek,

People will sit beside you if your charmed,
Bewailing younger times,
In disbelief that you have come to this,
Because they knew you when your presence shined,

Like you do now for those who mentored you,
Now you know time is real,
It's not that everyone's just died so far,
That, too, will be your deal,

Just not right now,
You are still young and strong,
Hold onto the feeling as much s'you can,
I guarantee it won't have seemed that long.

The Point

What’s the point in trying,
With so much thwarting you,
So much competition,
Your chances are but few,

Plus the limitations of your talent,
Made more by others’,
Compounded by the fickleness of taste,
You can’t guess what the criteria is,

Assuming you are given enough time,
To really do your best,
Which is dependent on self confidence,
Which couldn’t be much less?

What is the point?!
I’ll tell you what it is,
Otherwise you could just give up on life,
Which isn’t much of an alternative.

No Tomorrow

One more chance at daylight,
Until the sun's covered,
Humans think they have solved nature's puzzle,
But it's yet discovered,

It's got a patience not measured by time,
But by repetition,
Try solving things the same way o'er and o'er,
It will end you for multiplication.

If it wasn't too late I'd try again,
This is your brain talking,
Approach things with a mind clear of bias,
The findings are shocking,

Or would have been,
Maybe the next species,
Tomorrow no longer means anything,
Except for the end of humanity.

What You Can Do

You've got limitations,
Ev-erybody do,
Compare what you can do to what you can't,
To understand who's you,

You'll find the disparity quite immense,
Guess what side you are on,
If you could do one even just one per cent,
You would be a friggin' gargantuan,

But we are all facing a ratio,
Against infinity,
The scope of even all humans as one,
Is god's hilarity,

Then there is you,
Now that you understand,
Remember everyone's in the same boat,
Doing their best to do the best they can.

Be Careful

Be careful what you say,
There’s always thoughts behind,
That expressed themselves diff’rently before,
To actu’lize your mind,

That have remained the same your entire life,
 Or will they ever change,
Saying the same thing over and over,
Unlike words, rearranged,

So the more you say, the more you reveal,
Puzzle pieces to match,
Soon your mind will be transparent to all,
To correlate with facts,

Then you perish,
Death by transparency,
Everyone is trying to paint the world,
You’ll be a canvas for what their mind sees.

Keep Going

What do I know 'bout it,
I am way past my prime,
If all my dreams haven't happened by now,
May well lie down and die,

Says those with no faith in what gives them joy,
Or in the universe,
Try brushing your hair, pulling up your pants,
And believing in your sense of self worth,

So many people assume their failure,
Is lack of true talent,
When the pillars of time, design and cash,
Are the real deterrents,

So, hey, buck up,
It is never too late,
Even those who have found early success,
Must work hard to continue to relate.

Reaching Out

Despite how much you do,
Someone's always done more,
Even then, it is a roll of the dice,
Whether it's good or poor.

You don't know if the right ones have seen it,
They are always out there,
Fifteen billion possible eyes to catch,
Eleven of those of an age to care,

One hundred million might speak your language,
Maybe they will translate,
But can you find just the right turn of phrase,
To which all can relate?

Others have tried,
Really, that is the point,
The day we cease to exist as a race,
Is when there're no prophets left to anoint.

Efficiency

Not to mince any words,
At risk of wasting space,
Not taking advantage of each letter,
In the int'rest of haste,

Respecting the time of the digester,
The written word, itself,
Those who came before and bled on paper,
Collecting dust on a library shelf,

Those, now, who sweat in classrooms for their craft,
Who see where this goes wrong,
Who argue lyrics aren't poetry,
If they are put to song,

For all of this,
I ask for forgiveness,
I lack passion to know who I follow,
As well as scholarly rigorousness.

Nice To Eat You

Your skin is warm butter,
Spread over hard baguette,
Connected with strands of bucatini,
Coursing with sauce poulette,

Pumped head to toe by tender artichoke,
My hunger don't abate,
I lick your throat and scent radicchio,
Taste the dressing only you could create,

I knead your toes and feel the jelly 'neath,
Then juices of your rump,
Your mind, like a fine wine, suits my palate,
Taste sweet and body plump,

I dive inside,
The feasting never ends,
A cornucopia for the senses,
An experience both rich and intense.

Just Ignore It

Each day you ignore it,
'sday it don't exist,
It lives in some alternate universe,
Protected from your fist,

Free to grow just like any living thing,
Bigger, faster, stronger,
You don't have to pick a time to return,
It will return 'fyou only wait longer,

It will stand by you like an unfurled flag,
You'd rather not brandish,
Now too large to simply pack in a trunk,
It is now outlandish,

Just like you are,
For you have grown as well,
In proportion to thing you ignored,
That has become your own personal hell.

What Now

What’s it take to panic,
Lose faith in real’ty,
As if all the rules you’ve been living by,
Are now just history,

You turn to people you once thought were foes,
Out of desperation,
One’s instinct for survival trumps else,
In the face of your elimination,

Your reason gets thrown out of the window,
Along with your self-worth,
Like a blight has wiped out our entire race,
On this foresaken Earth?

Ain’t that funny,
To end like you were born,
Thrust into life with no capacity,
To default to anything but forelorn.

Meaning

Give your words more meaning,
Make each one of them count,
Don’t waste them away for the syllables,
Neither for how they sound,

Leave them be if they are meant to distract,
From your bare train of thought,
Leave the air open for words from others,
‘T’il the ones you need are finally caught,

Those that hurt will never prop up your cause,
For the hurt ne’er befriend,
Nor do the overly complimented,
They’ll leave you in the end.

Just be honest,
No one e’er expects that,
Then when they refuse to believe those words,
While they are speechless hit them with more facts.

Making It

Some say to just do it,
While they themselves just do,
'f'course, their triumph depends on the climate,
'f'the world they'be been put through,

Which raises some up upon its shoulders,
While stomping some with verve,
You don't like the weather, then wait five years,
Maybe you'll get what you feel you deserve,

For fickleness is not a human trait,
Hold on, for now it is,
Learning to let go 'f'how you thought you thought,
Is the key to success.

But keep your head,
The fulcrum of your brain,
The only constant left to fix your mind,
Stopping your fame from making you insane.

Instagram Beauty

My heart opened to her,
Though it was hurt before,
Once she was inside, I felt safe again,
I asked she close the door,

The branches tapped lightly on the window,
As my love held me tight,
Caressing me like those leaves on the tree,
Keeping me safe through the sounds of the night,

Before I met her I was a lone wolf,
Only meat could soothe me,
She tamed my wild spirit with love’s sweet herbs,
Now I am truly free.

All this and more,
Consume my words of love,
Wrap yourself in harlequin fantasies,
Born of celestial pow’r from above.

Ten

Like starch in a collar,
Enmeshed in the fibers,
Holding hands within the empty spaces,
Now everything's harder,

The sun is farther on the horizon,
Than e'er 'fore in hist'ry,
Its coldness felt though the distance not great,
Pulling me father from home for more heat,

Now lady justice, too, has changed her tune,
New lyrics I must learn,
With new terrain, new rules of survival,
I can hardly discern,

Because I'm stiff,
So fresh out of the wash,
To be blessed is not a blessing at all,
If my cup runneth o'er, th'excess is lost.

The American Standard

She is like a furnace,
Forced air, not a boiler,
There is so much hot wind blown out of her,
It is hard to foil her,

Adjusting her thermostat's like a game,
One you haven't been taught,
A complicated one with no ending,
That you can't e'en remember why you bought,

She's too big to fit through the outside door,
She is too loud to keep,
You would rather sleep 'neath fifty blankets,
Counting a thousand sheep,

Than leave her on,
You know of whom I speak,
You knew naught 'bout climate control back then,
But it's too late now you're an HVAC geek.

Wild is the Wind

My love is like the wind,
It rushes over fields,
Whipping the snow in twists on mountain peaks,
Until my lover yields,

My hungriness is only abated,
When the heart stops beating,
A wildness like mine cannot be restrained,
Until all the sheep I see stop bleating,

The sound of mandolin strumming far off,
Might still soothe this blood thirst,
But the memory of who I am might die,
If I don’t see you first.

Oh, when we met,
That’s when my life began,
Wild is the wind that rushes through me now,
Shearing my fur until I feel human.

The Nature of Pain

Pain is ev-erywhere,
Numbness in the shoulder,
A harsh cold spitting from indifferent air,
Each moment you're older,

Keeping down mem'ries of more foolish times,
Reminding they're not gone,
Witnessing the cruelty of others,
Despite your interconnected outcomes,

Kick a rock with the freedom of walking,
Then learn how much that hurts,
Our body's power cares not for others,
'S'long as we can exert,

Our existence,
Let all care for their own,
Name a pain not related to yourself,
In that discovery you are alone.

Wing On A Prayer

You cannot live on hope,
Dreams don’t do much either,
What effect can these things have here on earth?
They live in the ether,

Chimeras meant to tempt you from your life,
Created by, who knows,
Forever suggesting there’s greener grass,
In a place where grass cannot even grow,

Displacement of your powers meant for Earth,
To use on reality,
A timeless vacuum with no concern for,
Your own mortality,

Time to wake up,
Churn that hope to butter,
Spread it on something that stays on the ground,
Lest you, gazing up, fall in the gutter.

Coffee Scoops

It’s just a little thing,
Made into a big one,
Not for the consquences of the act,
Or trouble to get done,

The topic drills into fragile egos,
Right to the depth of souls,
Exposing truths that in the light of day,
Become fears of not achieving one’s goals,

Then trying to bury that awful truth,
Connections must be cut,
Time is needed to return to the state,
Of never ending rut,

Then reconnect,
But the tie’s ne’er as strong,
The chance to find an ally in this world,
Was thwarted by thought it’s something wrong.

What Have You Done?

Things just keep on moving,
You've no control o'er that,
The sun will rise and set a thousand times,
In the life of a rat,

Or a thousand Mayflies born and deceased,
Did they get ev'thing done?
How many seconds did each sit and brood,
About their existential condition?

But what luxury to do even this!
Though it's not about time,
Thought stretches moments to infinity,
When you're penning a rhyme,

Until you die,
That is another thing,
You're immortal right up to your last breath,
Whether a human or arctic lemming.

Stay Strong

Here comes the depression,
High tide upon the beach,
Slow as a clock, unstoppable as time,
Forever in your reach,

So comforting to know it’s there for you,
The answer to so much,
Plunge into an alternate existence,
Where responsibility cannot touch,

Until you drown and rise back up again,
Useful to nobody,
No longer safe under the lapping waves,
Of your personal sea,

Come back to us,
You've life enough to crawl,
E’en after so much time under water,
There is still a chance to reclaim it all.

All Events Are Due To Fate

Ev’rything’s converging,
The way it’s meant to do,
Not led by a conscious higher power,
That has int’rest in you,

Not due to nature’s intricate nature,
Beyond comprehension,
Complication’s manufactured by thought,
When trying to protect you from reason,

Nor’re circumstances inevitable,
We’re a cause in this world,
Whether or not you know where you’re going,
Your hands have helped unfurl,

The flag you fly,
That called those in your life,
Who might have shred things up pretty badly,
But you sharpened and armed them with the knife.

Rock-a-By

Sleep is over-rated,
Miss getting so much done,
Not to mention the unique perspective,
From sleep deprivation,

But what a curious aspect of life,
This dreamland we’re all sent,
You want to get the better of someone,
Eventually they are somnolent,

This must be the nature of matter, no?
All things just need some rest,
A twenty-eight billion dollar market,
For when we are deadest.

If you don’t sleep?
You will just die younger,
Amazing we’ve time to ponder ourselves,
Between that, breathing, conflict and hunger.

What D’you Got?

What’s it mean to be poor,
When you’ve cash in the bank,
Lots of people who care about your health,
A sailboat that ain’t sank,

Old relatives with money to leave you,
Great hair and a great job,
Culture and knowledge we’ll above the norm,
More good will than anybody could rob,

Opportunities out of the wazoo,
Health that goes for miles,
Social safety nets in case all else fails,
With a rock solid file,

with lots to lose?
D’ya recall the question?
Or’s your brain so trained to pity yourself,
You couldn’t hear o’er your lamentation?

Did You Write This?

It will be over soon,
What you've been fretting 'bout,
All you need is to believe in yourself,
Without a shred of doubt.

Brandish each of your words like a broadsword,
Someone must be victor,
If we each make our battle our own truth,
There's no reason for there to be losers,

The fight for life is for each to engage,
Allies each of us be,
The sandbox can fit our growing species,
If we just choose to see,

Not be greedy,
Or assume people worst,
Try for a day trusting all who you meet,
But you must make sure that you're sincere first.

No New Days

This isn’t a new day,
You can’t have a fresh start,
New thoughts cannot erase who you have been,
Like a new work of art,

It is not the rising sun that marks time,
But its trip ‘cross the sky,
Each moment on this earth it shines upon,
And on the other side,

Embrace your past under the light it lived,
The same light ‘round the Earth,
All the minutiae that finally led,
To your very own birth,

The good and bad,
They both contributed,
At the end of the day just ask yourself,
Were your actions circumstanc’lly suited?

Your Light

You have to figure out,
What it is you have left,
Once ev-erything that can be taken,
Is completely bereft,

Your money removed with no more income,
Possessions disappear,
Naked, friendless, your family all gone,
Along with anyone else you hold dear,

Tortured into revealing deep secrets,
Still your limbs are removed,
Even light is extinguished, then touch, too,
All else that might yet soothe,

So what is left,
That you may call your own?
Whatever ‘tis you must nurture it now,
For it’s what makes you unique ‘mongst the clones.

Life’s Make-Up

Your life isn’t one thing,
Nor is ev’rything one,
It is one thing happ’ning one at a time,
In linyar succession,

They can pass quickly, then so too does time,
Depending on your mood,
To make the most out of ev’erything,
Then you must give each thing it’s proper due,

Experience each thing for what it asks,
Both your feelings and thoughts,
Isolate those that are doing no good,
And revisit them not,

The choice is yours,
Don’t be in denial,
Consider all that life has to offer,
Reject all you find sick’ning and vial.

When We’re Apart

Just give me a smidgen,
Of the love that we share,
Enough to prime my pipes of confidence,
So’s I succeed out there,

So’s I can flow right back into your arms,
You who were primed also,
United as better individ’als,
So’s we are alright when one of us goes,

A condition of life you can’t avoid,
At least no one has, yet,
The only fact that gets me through the day,
So it’s not filled with fret,

At losing you,
Or fearing for your heart,
Knowing we’re happy and the other’s fine,
When our circumstances keep us apart.

Logic Games

There are seven swimmers,
Each will have their own lane,
Bobby, Chris, Dana, Flo, Guy, Hen and Joe,
There are rules to explain,

Chris will e’er be in a lane after Flo,
But not before Bobby,
If Dana is third, then Guy will be fifth,
In the first or seventh lane will Joe be,

Bobby will wear one of the three red caps,
There’s two green and two blue,
If you’re fifth, you’re green, but not if you slept,
Underneath the blue moon.

Now a question,
If Hen wakes up Thursday,
Decides he’ll stop swimming to study law,
Which swimmer will end up in the fourth lane?

Projections

Let me see your hist’ry,
Resting atop your head,
All the things you’ve done one could never guess,
Looking at how you’re dressed,

Or meeting you through a mutual friend,
Then dating for a while,
Spending hours a day getting to know you,
Helping you through a trag’dy to a smile,

Arguing at length ‘bout important things,
Like god and the future,
None of these things show all the nasty stuff,
To which you’ve been inured,

That surprise me,
Plus ev’ryone you know,
Perhaps if we were all an open book,
Our lives would not be filled with so much woe.

This Face

This face I’m sleeping on,
I’ve slept on it before,
Over fifteen thousand, five hundred nights,
P’haps fifteen thousand more,

Nights of fear for what the day might then bring,
Nights of unbridled joy,
Nights when my brain didn’t know where it was,
Preoccupied with the thoughts of a boy,

Nights that my eyes saw more than they should have,
Forever now in me,
Nights I wished my head would ne’er rise again,
Oh, human self-pity.

Look at this face,
Tell me, what do you see?
There are hours ‘pon hours when it lay alone,
Time etching marks of impermanency.

Above the Clouds

In a hot air balloon,
Least five in a straight line,
Moving swiftly over a sheet of clouds,
Where the sun always shines,

Then one-by-one they’re caught in tree branches,
Stood impossibly high,
My feet dangling over the basket’s side,
Clouds so wet, pants get soaked up to the thigh,

I climb out onto a near tree platform,
With the rest of the fleet,
To watch a drummer a few trees away,
Starting us on a beat,

Completely new,
For the new life we found,
I’m not sure what, but that dream said something,
Meant for the me set firmly on the ground.

Plus Formatting

It is one eleven,
Now it’s twelve minutes past,
How much time do these things take me to do,
At fourteen you do ask,

It depends if I have something to say,
Now I am at fifteen,
Or if I’m just writing for writing’s sake,
‘cause when I don’t I feel it’s a failing,

Then seventeen pops up its ugly head,
I’m not against a clock,
But how hard do you have to think sometimes,
To feel that you have talked?

It took a while,
To think of that last one,
Now you know what I’m able to produce,
From one eleven to one twenty-one.

Not Me

What will you learn from me?
The tricks of a canine,
Yes, useful when you want to roll over,
You know, just tow the line,

Leave all your dreams and desires back of mind,
They’re not important,
Do not fight for something so selfishly,
You garble what the opposition meant,

Don’t get angry at my supplication,
Rebel with fortitude,
Look at me with disdain for my weakness,
However you construe,

Your place midst me,
Make me your nemesis,
Better you hate what I have become t’you,
Than become what I’d hate on my conscience.